Saturday, December 2, 2006

Who I've Ski'd With

Since "everyday Joe" is about as exciting as, well, nada . . . here's something I wrote on Epic Ski as a contribution to one of the threads over there.

Wow...and I thought my "brushes with celebrity" would never be useful . . .

Bill Clinton before he was President. If you recall, he gave the longest winded introduction speech for somebody at the Democratic Convention (was it Dutaxis?) and his speech was so long that the acceptance speech was actually no longer in prime time. Anyway, the reason I remember him is because he was on Johnny Carson right after that and then that winter (about 2 months later) I was skiing in Upper New York and somebody said "Make way for the Governor" and bam, there he was...it was very cool looking back at it but at the time, he was a big oaf that was way too friendly (Remember, this was 20 or so years ago and I was alot more interested in riding with cutie girls than with him...come to think of it, he would have likely wanted to ride with some cutie girls too).

Joe Paterno. I went to Penn State and the little ski hill where I patrolled in College was the best and closest version of skiing that we got. This happened right after the 1982 (I think) National Championship, JoePa's first. He was very cool and we didn't even talk about football. Managed to ride up with him 3 or 4 times that day and ski'd down with him a couple times too. He was good.

Michael Dorn...Warf from Star Trek. This is one of the truly normal people I've ever met and I ski'd with him and his three buddies for most of a day at Squaw Valley. He was so cool and normal, aside from being a massive human being and having the longest ski's I've ever seen on someone (something like 230's if I recall) he could actually carve it up pretty well. When all was said and done, he bought me a round or two and was just so normal about everything. Aside from being nearly unrecognizable (because of the make-up), his voice was so recognizable and he was very careful not to cause a scene. Excellent dude.

Someone few of you will ever remember is the first African American US Navy Blue Angel Donnie Cochran. Truly an excellent guy, athletic as all get out and selfless to a fault. Too bad he couldn't fly a Blue Jet well.

OK, now I SWEAR this is true although no one ever believes me and no one saw it and I don't have the pictures to prove it, nor the tshirt, the autograph or anything like that but I SWEAR I once got to ski about 50 yards in trail of Raquel Welch. It was at Aspen, mid 80's or so and since I was in my 20's and she was still hot, hot, hot...it was a dream come true. Not sure why no one believes me when I tell them...but I SWEAR it's true.

Not Hugh Hefner, but his brother Keith (???) in the mid-90's in of all places, some dinky little resort in North Carolina. He was there promoting something, or maybe just hanging out and I got introduced to him by a buddy saying "Here's the guy who's brother shares your birthday" (side bar, I've got the same birthday as Hef - April 9). So, I get introduced to him as he's walking out the door from lunch to go skiing and I end up being in the single line and happen to hook up with his group of 2 or 3 and ride up for about 10 minutes talking about my shared birthday and me asking why Hef has never sent me a birthday card (pathetic story about me, I've sent Hef a birthday card for about the past 25 years and I've never gotten one back...jerk!).

Wayne Gretzky and Janet Jones about 8 years ago in Banff. Janet's from St. Louis and it turns out a friend of a friend, blah, blah 6 degrees of separation knew that they were going to be there when I was there and offered to hook us up. I figured why not, at least I could pimp Wayne for staying on the Blues for only half a season, but it turned out that they were really nice and down to earth and it was just a really nice half day of skiing.

Never did ski with Chuck Yeager (and you're right, he is a total jerk and pompous ass), but I did ski a day with some pretty famous fighter pilots, Francis Gabreski (who was about 300 years old when I met up with him in the late 80's but could still ski the planks off of anybody) and was as nice as all get out and a few years later with Randy "Duke" Cunningham (disgraced congressman from California) and Gen. Steve Ritchie (both Vietnam era Aces).

Then of course, there was the week I spent skiing with Howard Hughes, but it's all so fuzzy now.

I wish I could offer up someone younger and hotter (Brittney???) but, alas, I'm never where they are...or vice versa so, there you have it.

eMail, if you will: skipatrollerstl@yahoo.com, or just post a comment, below.
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"If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough." - Mario Andretti

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